Receive Correction

When I reflect on my lifetime in God’s house, I have to acknowledge God’s grace that I’m still here. Especially in my own tween/teen years, well-intended church-going do-gooders decided it was their Christian duty to beat me over the head with (often misinterpreted) Scripture. Though they aimed to “speak truth in love” (another Scripture taken out of context), they didn’t love but judged. For whatever reason they plucked from the air that week, they insisted I didn’t measure up and had to conform. They were wise (in their own eyes) and I had reason to “fear the Lord,” they said.

Fear them, is more accurate.

Of course there are appropriate occasions for discipline. Parent to child. Spouse to spouse. Teacher to child. Mentor to mentee. Dear friends, one to another. In large part, the right to speak discipline to another is an earned privilege.

The problem comes when we set ourselves to tweeze the splinter from another’s eye—without permission, usually—when we haven’t first spent sufficient time humbly on our knees, letting God surgically remove the log from our eyes. Rather than offering relief, in blindness we risk inflicting more blindness.

Jesus is the Way, the Truth, the Life. We in the Church bear witness to the True Word of God Incarnate through the Truth in God’s written Word. But rather than pointing to Truth’s freedom and the sacrificial love of our Savior, we too casually wield our interpretation of truth as a weapon. We all need way more grace.

Notice I lump myself in, “we” and not merely “they.” Hurt people hurt people. I confess I’ve done it, too: been too free with judgmental words. Lord, have mercy on us all.

Sin clouds every human being and every organization, the Church necessarily included. We pray for better among God’s people but—maybe because we claim to have access to the Truth?—the Church is regularly a repeat offender. Sadly, I completely understand why so many, including people I love dearly, want nothing to do with it.

Yet, God calls us to community, to corporate worship, to life together, and so I remain committed to His beloved, broken institution. And though I strive to remain open and soft-hearted, I hold my scarred heart gingerly when it comes to receiving correction. Of course I want to grow in wisdom. I’m just careful about who claims to be offering wisdom.

God, though… He’s not safe but He is good, to paraphrase C.S. Lewis. His Word, regularly studied and prayed, in truth offers Truth. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 says, “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” The Spirit of God, speaking to our hearts through the inspired Word of God, tells us what we need to know (teaching), stop (rebuking), change (correcting), and do (training in righteousness) so that we’re ready for all the good things God has planned for us.

His correction gives life. He keeps me on course, directing me on right paths. He created me and knows the intricate details He built into my wiring, and so only He truly knows how to steer me in the right direction.

You be you, says the world, but God only knows how I can be my best me. God’s love and continual restoration of this life He gave me makes spending time with Him in His life-giving Word so worth the discipline of invested time.

Deep & Wise: Uncommon Sense from the Proverbs
Week 2 – Receive Correction

Connect
Reflect on an important lesson you’ve learned recently.

Study
Read aloud Proverbs 12:1.
How would you explain the connection between discipline, knowledge, and correction?Read aloud Proverbs 3:5-8, 11-12.
According to these verses, what does it look like to trust the Lord? How is that related to correction?
Why should someone trust the Lord?
Read aloud Proverbs 15:31-33.
How does correction give life?
What does it mean to “fear the Lord”?

Live
Generally, do you tend to despise or heed correction? What makes the difference in your response?
How does the Lord offer His discipline/correction? How can you receive it?
What role does trust play in receiving correction?
How can receiving the Lord’s correction increase your trust in Him?
What is Jesus saying to you through this study, and how will you respond?

Pray
Pray that you will be open to receiving the Lord’s correction.

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Creating Trust

As we head into the holiday season, many of us anticipate time with family and extended family… Cue the emotions! While today’s post isn’t about holidays, it is about trusting God with our families in life’s everyday moments and the brutal no-one-wants-that-news time-suspending experiences. It serves as a good reminder to never take life–and the people who grace or sustain our lives–for granted. (BTW, Sarah does make darling Christmas decorations and I am proud to own an original!)

Create Challenge #39: Sarah Johnson

When I was asked to contribute to this blog and the topic was “creating” my mind immediately went to the physical sense of the word. I asked myself, what do I create? Well, I like to think I create a comfortable home that my husband and children enjoy and feel safe in. Then I thought, well, I’m creative! I like to make Christmas decorations, and was even able to sell some (for actual money)!

But God was not ready for me to “create” this story yet.in-god-we-trust-header

Then one evening in February He gave me a real story worth sharing. It was not an easy story to take in as my reality, but He gave it to me anyway.

You see, my mom had a subarachnoid brain hemorrhage. She was all the way in Dallas, Texas, while I was all the way in Northern California. The call came with this devastating news well into the evening, too late to get a flight home to be with her.

Here is where Trust comes in. I had no choice but to Trust that the Lord had my mom in His hands. And I had to Trust that He already knew the outcome to this devastating news that was my very fresh and raw reality. As I lay on the couch waiting for my 3:00am alarm to sound, so that I could fly to Dallas, I had to Trust.

I arrived into Dallas and made it to the hospital before my mom was even out of her 5 hour craniotomy. Again Trust. But I was starting to feel something totally unexpected. I was feeling the comfort of the Lord surrounding me and my family during this extremely difficult time, a time that I would have thought I would be sitting there feeling completely helpless. I felt almost empowered by the Grace of God, and I just “knew” my mom was going to be OK.

So all of a sudden I found myself in this role that I had not expected to be in, a role only the Lord would see fit for the youngest daughter of three. A role of a rock, a rock that my father was able to lean on, a rock that my sister was able to lean on, and a rock that my BIG brother was able to lean on. You see, I would have guessed that my big brother would have taken that role or even my sister; they are older and wiser, right? But God had another plan. I trusted Him in this, and ran with it.

I was able through Trust to see the Lord’s hand working in all of us. I could already see Him working through my brother, stirring emotions in him that had not been stirred in a while. I could feel His presence during different conversations I had with many different family members and close family friends. I was able to stay strong and, hopefully through this strength, show others God’s Grace. I could see and feel the Lord very clearly, and I just knew my mom was going to be okay.

We are on the other side of this horrific event, an event I would not wish on my worst enemy. But we are all stronger because of it. My mom is doing great and, to be honest, better than she was before.

God works in mysterious ways; He will go to great lengths to make things happen, and to answer our prayers. You see, my mom was not a bad person, not evil or malicious. She just was not always happy. A bit cynical at times, like you never knew what kind of mood she was going to be in. So for years my sister had been praying that the Lord would soften her heart. Well, guess what? He did! Since she had the brain injury she has laughed more than ever. She is always positive, and reminding all of us to look at life with the glass half full instead of empty.

Trust, my friend, is what the dear Lord created in me that evening in February.

sjohnson

 

 

My name is Sarah Johnson. I’m a native Texan who has been living in the beautiful state of California for the past 21 years! I met my husband 20 years ago, and we have been married for 17 years and counting. We have two beautiful daughters, a 12 year old and a 14 year old. I do miss all my family and friends in Texas (desperately!), but I do love the life I have built out here as well.

Garage

“Mom, I’m okay, I wasn’t involved, but the police want you to come pick me up.”

My heart races at this rush of words through the telephone.

Teen and two other boys had permission to spend a summer night at another friend’s house. He has a game room and they wanted to play late into the night.

Teen neglected to tell us parents would not be home; we goofed and didn’t check.

Someone invited someone who invited someone else who did something stupid to attract police attention before arriving at the now-party. Police ran a license plate, called parents, and eventually discovered unsupervised minors, some of whom were still obliviously playing games.

Guy went to get him while I stayed home and prayed. Obviously the car ride home involved a conversation about trust and a now-depleted, in fact negatively balanced, Trust Account.

Teen has never been a big gamer. He is a health-conscious athlete and mostly a likable, good kid. He gets in trouble because he acts impulsively, the tell-tale symptom of his ADHD which inclines him to risk-taking. Honest to God, I’m grateful his risk in this situation was relatively low.

Teen barely knew the kid for whom the cops arrived and he easily recognized the stupidity of the kid’s actions. He never argued about being grounded. He understood that the situation could quickly have become So Much Worse. He learned something.

A summer week without friends might be a rough kid-consequence, but his parents enjoyed hanging out with our Teen. He won’t say it, but he might have had some fun with his family, too.

This is the reason we spent our not-truly-a-staycation cleaning out and reorganizing our garage (aka storage-unit) into a hang-out space. Not in response, as we’d already begun the process before the incident, but because we want our house to be a place Teen wants to bring friends.

Teen’s tendency has been to go out rather than invite friends in. Understandably, as our smallish house lacked a space with sufficient separation from Family Life. Almost simultaneously, Teen bought a PS3 + games from a friend who had moved on to a newer system, and friends offered us their sectional couch and rug. We saw an opportunity.

garage

Purging in process

garage 2

Prepping for sanding/painting

Parents did most of the purging; Teen put on his work clothes to move furniture, to sand and paint. He offered input on where things should go (he pushed us to purge even more) and what else might be needed (mini fridge, space warmer for cold nights). He even reorganized games into attractive storage boxes.

It’s still a garage – bikes and sports equipment, tools and laundry, no cars (we live in California) – but thankfully, the renovation worked. Over the last three months, Teen has stayed home more than he might have AND he has invited friends in. Goal! It has also given Guy a new opportunity to bond and play with his boys and provided another comfortable hang out space.

Our garage-pantry makes for easy snack access; cat = happy, too!

Our garage-pantry makes for easy snack access; cat = happy, too!

No perfect solution, the Man Cave has also created new problems. Teen hears the siren call of video games so much louder than our reminders to get homework done first. It has become a too-frequent escape when he’d prefer not to engage with family. And the three guys enjoying the space so much sometimes leaves Mama out. As families do, we negotiate as we go.

We listened with ears, eyes, heart, and our love for Teen led us to a Labor of Love: a garage hang-out space. He receives love best through Time and Gifts, and I’ve seen it in his eyes – he understands that we spent significant Time to create a Gift of space for him.

I asked him again today: “Are you grateful we worked so hard to create this space for you?”

He responded, “No, Mom. Seriously, are you really asking me that? Yes, I’m grateful.”

Sarcasm aside, he is grateful. He received the love. I’ll take it.

Let it Be

Last week God gave me a miracle of closure.

Almost a year ago, a long-time friendly acquaintance, a would-be friend had we shared greater proximity in the time we’ve known one another, well, she threw me under the bus.

She observed and entirely misunderstood an encounter I had with someone else. Instead of talking to me, she spoke poorly of me to others. Word got back to me, and I got back to her.

Because I’m better in writing, I wrote her a note and took the high road for the sake of the relationship. I didn’t attempt to explain, simply stated that I thought there had been a misunderstanding. I apologized, even asked for forgiveness, for having unintentionally offended her. I expressed gratitude for our relationship. I never heard back from her.

Which meant that every time I saw her I felt injured and sad. Stung. Rejected.

But I also felt like I’d done what I’d needed to, and the rest was on her. Best I could, I had to let it be.

Last weekend Guy and I attended a local art and wine festival. As we sipped cold beer in the shade, hiding from the blistering sun while we listened to an exceptionally good Beatles cover band, quite suddenly SHE was standing directly in front of me. She was laughing and hugging us both. She introduced us to her husband. She gave us the whole run-down on how she’s doing, how her kids are doing, kids I’ve prayed for, kids who have moved from early adolescence through college graduation in the time I’ve known her.

As if nothing had ever happened. She was exactly the same friendly, happy acquaintance I’ve always known.

We parted ways and eventually found a quiet table. Stunned, I reminded Guy of the situation a year ago; he never knew who the other player had been. She has a job now and can no longer attend our regular gathering. Barring any more spontaneous God-encounters, that may possibly have been the last time I’ll see her.

The band’s song broke through my reflections: “Let it Be.”

When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.

Of course Mary’s situation couldn’t be more different, but her words of wisdom ring true just the same: Let it be. Whatever God intends, let it be. God noticed this one small ache in my heart and orchestrated closure. He asked me to forgive, and when I still couldn’t forget, He brought joy. Let it be.

Those words have stuck with me this week as Tween has caught us up in another cyclone of abdominal migraines. They warned us it could get worse and the variation in this cycle, the night-time vomiting, the not-enough-warning make-a-mess vomiting, yup, they’re worse.

sick QNot to mention the middle school homework piling up. And the silence from his teachers, despite our request for class notes and extra directions necessary to understand the assignments.

The specialist has ordered more tests, and referred us to another doctor who will likely order more tests. Meanwhile, the anti-nausea meds continue to be ineffective.

Panic threatens to drown me, and so I whisper words of wisdom: Let it be.

We didn’t ask for this. We don’t know what causes it or how to stop it. We simply take each hour, each episode, as it comes. Really, what choice do we have?

God cares about the little things, and so I trust that He cares even more about the big things. Keeping life in perspective, there are Much Bigger Things than a week of vomiting. But for now this is our Big Thing, and I will trust that God cares.

Let it be. And as I was reminded again yesterday, let me be still and know that He is God. He will be exalted among the nations. He will be exalted in the earth (Psalm 46:10).

He’s got the nations. He created and sustains the whole earth. He’s certainly got us. Amen.